Benjamin's Buttons

Benjamin has buttons- and his brothers think it's really fun to push them. Benjamin reacts in all the best ways- screaming, dramatic soliloquy, collapsing in despair, the works. Benjamin also likes to push his brother's buttons. He likes to follow people around and repeat the same word over and over or just get in someone's personal space and refuse to move. It would be shame to let this button-pushing ability die out so Benjamin has an understudy. Tobias. Those two are quite the team. They call each other "my best brother" and choose lots of interesting activities to do together. These activities push MY buttons. Here's a few I've witnessed in the last little while:



1. Laundry Hamper Wrestling
We had, notice the past tense, one of those tall, circular plastic laundry hampers. It was blue with floral cutouts. I would frequently find the two of them literally rolling around inside it and trying to smash the other one's face against the plastic. Floral imprints look really cute the side of your head. I finally threw the hamper away. I know, I'm mean. I believe the phrase was "meanest mom ever".

2. "Try Not to Say Ouch"
I was exasperated one day when I came into the living room for the third time because of the shrieks of pain emanating from that general direction. Each time, the shrieks would stop immediately and then pick up as soon as I walked out. "What is going on here?!?" I finally half-shouted. "It's a game Mom, Try Not to Say Ouch." Ahh, but shrieks are okay. Very manly.

3. Spaghetti Dance
There is no description that will do this justice. Just come over and request to see it in person. The two boys dance, usually outside in the front yard, in a way that conveys that their limbs have become noodles. It's hilarious and cute.

4. Marker Mooning
This only happened once, to my knowledge. It was one of those times when I foolishly thought I could the bathroom. When will I learn? When I emerged, the twins were having a water fight in the house and Benjamin and Tobias were chasing each other through the house, pant-less, with markers. They had rainbow bums by the time I caught them and confiscated the markers. David John was loosely involved in a cheerleader capacity but (no pun intended) this was definitely a Benjamin production.

5. Crying about Candy
We got flu shots for all the boys. The shots went by without tears. I mean, sure, we had to sit on some of them and some of them might have been unrolling the exam table paper but we made it through. Until it was time to get a piece of candy as a reward. Benjamin and Tobias chose first and quickly inhaled the candy. When they watched their brothers pick out different candies, they instantly had regret over their own hasty choices and cried their way out of the clinic. Good times.

6. Roof Ball
"Mom! If a ball gets stuck on the roof, can we climb on top of the house and get it down?"
"Um, noooo. And why would a ball be getting stuck on the roof?"
"We're playing roof ball! We throw the ball at the roof and see if it stays!"
"No! No, we are not playing roof ball."
I am the "worst mom ever".

When he's not pushing buttons, Benjamin can be pretty stinkin' adorable. He makes elaborate pretend play with all kinds of things, including random game pieces.

Chess pieces, Simpsons Clue and an Uno Moo barn- what more could a boy ask for? This was a very involved story with a lot of sound effects.

He waxes eloquent about matters of relgion, "Jesus goes to church in outer space." He knows his strengths. I unkindly asked him one day how he could forget to give his teacher an important paper that had been in his backpack for days and days. He cheerily replied, "I'm just a really good forgetter!" That's right buddy. You be you. I'm glad he didn't let a frustrated mom push his buttons.