Born on the 30th of July

That's right, our David John turned 6 one month ago and started kindergarten last week. He's lost some of his baby fat and he can read chapter books but this kid is still ridiculously cute and funny. Right now he is obsessed with all things Minion and Super-hero Squad cards. He's reading Peter and the Starcatchers. He likes to read and watch Scaredy Squirrel. He loves dogs. We may have to break down and get one someday. We love this kid. Here are some pictures and classic David John quotes from last month.

"Wait, in kindergarten I will have a principal? I hope she doesn't put me in the choker!" (Yep, he's read Matilda.)

That moment when you try to just drink your smoothie straight out of the cup.

David John was expelled from his preschool in the Spring for bad behavior. He's the most stubborn child I have ever met. Since I was teaching music at the school, I actually witnessed him lie on a rug with his bum in the air for three hours without moving instead of following a directive from a teacher. Anyway, when I asked him what happened on the day he was dismissed he shrugged his shoulders and said, "I've been lemonaded."

We had a friend in the van with us one day and for some reason the boys were talking about kisses. The friend said that he loves his mom and he kisses her on the cheek. David John said in disgust, "Ugh! That is so romantic!"

There was food and fun at the family get together, but a giant mud puddle trumps all.

At art lessons, the children were supposed be making a color gradient by adding black and white paint to a colored paint. When the teacher came to check on David John he had made five beautiful blends of various colors to make a very aesthetic collection. But they were definitely not a gradient. The teacher explained what he was supposed to do and he replied, "I didn't quite get the point." Free thinker that one.

On our drive to Utah, we experienced a very bad smell wafting in the windows. I said "It smells like there was a fire at the cigarette factory." David John: "I don't even know how to smoke!" Elijah: "Did someone toot?" David John: "It wasn't me. They don't smell like that."

"Mom, am I so dirty?"

Lately, the boys have talked a lot about who their "girlfriends" are and who they are going to marry. David John listed several candidates but the boys shut him down. All the girls he talked about were too old, too young, already taken, etc. Exasperated he asked, "Who am I going to marry then?!?" I explained that he would probably end up marrying someone that he hasn't even met yet. He said, "You mean I have to marry someone I don't even know?!?"

"Mom, when I gargle there are tiny drops of rain falling out of my mouth." Yes, I know. I can tell when you gargle because the floor is all wet.

David John originally asked for a blueberry cake with popsicle candles, but he settled for a fruit pizza with blueberries on it and popsicles on the side.

David John: "Mom, it is crazy! We all jumped on Tobias over and over and he didn't cry!"
Me: "Let's not jump on him anymore. I don't want him to get hurt."
David John: "Oh, he won't. Someone else is the target now."

David John was invited to a Boxcar Children themed birthday party. He was talking about the "Boxer Kids" for a week. This is probably a freudian slip based on the fact that certain people in our house like to run around in their underwear.

Here's the birthday boy sporting his minion shirt. On the morning of his birthday we had a private screening of The Minion Movie at a fancy theater in Orem. The boys all loved it.

Truth or dare has become standard fare at our house. For some reason the "truth" question is always, "Who is your girlfriend?" When they asked David John he just started laughing uncontrollably. When he could breathe he said, "I get laughy when we talk about romantic stuff."